A blog of the plastic surgeon, Marc Pacifico
So … you have made the great decision that you want to move forward with the facial stretching that you have bone consultations for many years; You have seen your plastic surgeon and you feel sure to process … However, your partner seems to do this, or at best, without support. This can be demotivating, annoying and can make some people quite annoying.
However, in my experience, if we take a minute to analyze why it can be the case, I could really help generate some essential conversations and improve communication and support between you and your partner.
Fundamentally, of my observations, there are two main reasons why the partners can appear against their facial stretch plans:
- Do you fear that you are damaged, of a totally elective procedure (“unnecessary” in your mind?)
- They fear that it looks different/strange/operated.
The first reason is likely to be quite self-expansion. There could simply be a lack of understanding and empathy about why it is possible that I want to have a face washing first. In other words, the inability to see things from his perspective: through his eyes. But more than that too, as it fits a patient or mine, he said eloquently: “No one knows what it is to be in the skin of another person.” It is that central appreciation of “why” that could help here. Really trying to explain how you feel, maybe feelings of invisibility, feelings that permeate on a daily base, feel that it puts a small but persistent weight on your shoulders day after day.
If this could be modified, your feelings of self -esteem, self -confidence, self -life and positivity would be transformed, which gives you a new life opportunity. Having a conversation to explain these deep motivations could help your partner to appreciate that this is not simply a trivial and risky decision, but an important decision of life that will have positive repercussions for some time.
In terms of the second factor, we can see that there are still more nuanced emotions and feelings that could cause themselves without problems, making your partner feel uncomfortable, but perhaps without realizing why they feel like that.
I remember a great story of a patient who illustrates it perfectly: I saw her a couple of months after her stretching of the face and neck, and she knew that her husband was very against her procedures and did not have bone support after surgery. However, she said that she had changed totally, and now she could be happier with her decision. “What happened?” I asked. She told me that she knew exactly at the time her attitude changed. They were in the theater with her older friend (who was not feeling in surgery), and she went to the interval of drinks with bath duration. While she was out, her husband’s friend turned to him and commented how incredible her wife looked like that night, and had seen her wearing like this for years. That was all! That was all that was tok to tell the husband subconsciously that his wife looked great, looked natural and had no distinctive seal of having done something.
Without him knowing, he had become obsessed with the fact that, knowing that he had undergone facial surgery, everyone else must also see this and that he must look at everyone as “he had worked.” In fact, nothing could have been further from the truth: she seemed natural, without signs or stigmas of having had surgery, he just needed to have heard him of an independent reliable trust to allow that change to happen.
Subconsciously, many partners will have more thoughts through their minds: what will your friends think if it is obvious that your wife has a face washing? Will it be a stock of laughter? Will people speak behind them? However, they can let you feel uncomfortable and out of control (even if you hear, hey, exactly why), which could result in that feeling of lack of care and support.
Personally, it seems totally understandable, particularly when the media flood us that show celebrities and strange -looking people who have bones thrown and high in a very unnatural way.
Perhaps the best way to address this from the beginning is to insist that your partner joins you for the preoperative consultation process, so that they can see many photos of before and after the legs of your surgeon, to be insured that the results.
If you can address the thesis, two main security conerns, with a deep understanding of why you are making this decision; In addition to dissipating Frears that will be unnatural and will operate after surgery, in my experience, it will contribute greatly to obtain the support it deserves for this great decision of life.
I hope you found my useful and useful thoughts, I always appreciate the comments!
